Hmmm

sigh... today's chem day... yeah got back chem...the cohort was FANTASTIC... the mode was O yes... abt 210 ppl had O(35-49 marks) n i am one of theM!!! siGH... another flop... what the hell is wrong with me lar..... did somebody lock my brain up or ate it? pls return it to me... i'm realli in need of my brain~~~ siGhz... i can't imagine if this were to happen during As... oMg... i'm visualizing the moment when i get back my result slip n i have like OOO or what den i might as well dig a hole n bury myself alive!!! goSH... this is great! i have motivation to mug already! aRGH... feel so disgusted with myself....AGAIN...whats up with me man....269, 7 , n now...realli xiao shi liao liao da wei bi jia! F man...

anyway, don't have to worry abt me... jus pouring my grouses to you who are so free to read my blog...wait for good news next year! haha... may this be the only pit in my life!

hmmm... feeling numb now... monday blues...recently in the empty slots of time with nothing to do, i've been thinking about alot of things... mainly about myself... what's the purpose of life? what comes after death? are we jus an empty shell when our hearts stops n breathing ceases? I sort of believe in after-life... well... are all things in life predestined? Am i strong enough to take anyting that comes my way in stride? yuelin's mood has sort of affected my thoughts... he's unhappy over some things in life... so m i...(mainly results lar for me) is failure lethal? why should our lives be scarred by unhappy things that happen in life? well, unhappy, traumatic experiences are hard to forget, and neither should they be forgotten. Such experiences are part of our lives and they are what defines a human life that begins from birth, where everything that we feel, see, touch,smell, taste translate into our own stories. Neither you nor i can fathom what becomes of people after they die. The only thing that we can relate to is what happens here and now... What i'm trying to say is that we should open our hearts and mind to whatever happens to us and yes... face the music... more often than not, all it takes to overcome negative feelings is a change in viewpoint. Feeling hungry sucks.... you hate it... but instead of being grouchy, tell yourself that your food will be tastier when ur famished! hmmmm weak analogy but i suppose u get what i mean...

jus now was flipping through a mag...lifestyle... den i saw this pic of a very beautiful woman beside another pic of the same woman, but about 20 to 30 years later. My god! how she has aged! it den hit me that youth and time are possessions that slip away from us every moment and we will age one day, losing our supple skin, agility and all other manifestations of youth in exchange for wrinkles, walking sticks etc. We should really enjoy n indulge ourselves in the time that is now n the youth that is us. Why let negative experiences and feelings put us down, make us waste precious time feeling sad n all, when we jus need a change in viewpoint to set free the youth in us to make all experiences, good and bad alike, precious memories that will accompany us in old?

not all of us can have to-die-for figures, exams killing intelligence, almighty riches, fame, power whatever. of course it doesn't mean we shouldn't work towards self improvement, but i believe that whatever decisions you make, you must be answerable to yourself. basically, live happy in all situations. what matters is that we have not wasted time. hmmmm.

hmmm...actually i'm not surprised if you dun understand what i wrote above... they are jus fragments of my jumble of thoughts... but i'll be glad if my thoughts made any difference to you out there who's feeling like its the end of the world the next second!